Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
