Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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