Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
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