I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I don't want my vagina anymore.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
