What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize