What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
