ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
