some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Randomize