Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
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I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
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My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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