At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize