I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
