A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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