I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why can't burritos get me drunk
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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