she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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