Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
last night I used snow as a chaser
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
