They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
So many bounce houses so little time
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
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Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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