Having a random hookup so left but love u
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize
