yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize