dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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