Please, let me fuck your mom
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Randomize