Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
