In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Randomize
