I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Randomize