dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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