The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
