i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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