Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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