come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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