i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
I'm really busy with my period
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