It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Fuck appropriateness.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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