i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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