found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
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