uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Randomize
