so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
