fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Randomize
