This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
