we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
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I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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