I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
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