he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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