What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
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