Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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