At least make sure they are 18
Why
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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