how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Randomize
