In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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