sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Randomize
