awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
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