Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
