Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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