We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
