the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
