This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
